Minute44 - Dan Schonhaar

Well, the annual Subculture beach party has been announced for Saturday the 4th of August. Fantastic, except that it’s the one weekend of the year where I have work commitments! It’s probably gonna be ok though because the work is usually out of the way by the tail end of Saturday which menas I’ll be able to drive down afterwards and get my drink on. The only bad thing is I’ll have to wait unitl the day itself before I know for sure. I hate not having a plan!

Well, on other news, this weekend is Gaz’s wedding and I have the pivotal role of best man in the procedings, a role shared with Scott, Gaz’s brother. I’m confident all will go to plan.. if not I’ll just get shitfaced. I’ve already told Holly that I can hang out with her on Sunday but I may need to be put in a cold shower to help me get out of the hang over. The only thing that is worrying me at this point is the speech I am to make… or the lack of one. My plan is to ad lib the whole thing but we’ll see how well that goes on the day.

Today is Pay day! Wooop!! It came around quicker than I thought actually I only realised it was the 27th when I switched my alarm off this morning and my phone said “pay day”. I was like, Kerching!!! Of course a chunk of it will have to go on clearing some out-standing bills but that shouldn’t be too much of an issue. I’m gonna go to ’snakes like I said in my last post and see if I can’t get a new pair of jeans. Failing that I’ll go to non-stop and get a pair.

Last night I watched Apocolypto again and enjoyed it just as much as the first time I saw it. Much laughing came at the expense of the half-wit chav at the video store though. Our first selection was Green Street which I’ve heard was really good and the chav came up and was like “Awesome film! Better than the Football Factory!!” So reedy instantly asked, in the most condescending way possible, “You mean more violent?” to which he replied “Yeah, huhuh” We promptly put it back on the shelf and grabbed Apocolypto to which the chav said “You know thats all in subtitles…?” I felt like going “Yes, unlike you, I can read. ;)” He was a knuckle dragging mouth-breather if I ever saw one. Which brings me to another pet hate of mine. Chavs that address you as “oi”. It winds me up no end. I just feel like turning around and exploding at them like “I hope you’re not addressing me you ignorant little worm! If you don’t know my name, excuse me will do. Now fuck off!”

I’ve managed to get Friday afternoon off work so I can chill with Nat in the because I will be occupied with Gaz’s wedding over the weekend. Might just go into notts or maybe Derby and get some dinner in ze evening.

Ooooh!!! The new series of FoneJacker starts on the 5th of July!! I seriously cannot wait for that as it always gets hearty belly laughs out of me. I’m a child at heart you see and a sucker for prank calls. “Good evening sir, my name is George Agdgdgwengo and I am calling from your bank…” Classic!!

In other news, I’ve been thinking about writing a short story. I’ve been loving the work of Philip K Dick recently and it has inspired me to do a kind if PKD-esque type sci-fi story with a little bit of Being John Malkovich thrown in. Sound odd? Well a lot of Dick’s work is quite weird and usually very complicated. For those of you not aware who he is, Philip K Dick is the writer responsible for A Scanner Darkly, Total Recall, Minority Report and Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep (Better known as Blade Runner).

I only have ideas as far as now but here they are… tell me what you think.

Evan is an average man, works a steady job, has a wife, children, all the usual stuff but he has an overwhelming sense that he is being watched. He can’t prove what he suspects but he finds himself looking over his shoulder to see no one and feels a presence in rooms in which he is surely alone. But when his family is brutally murdered the psychological and emotional trauma leads him to discover the unimaginalble and he soon discovers that being watched is just the tip of the iceberg. He discovers that he, among countless others are the unknowing subjects of a global experiment designed to compormise all aspects of personal privacy.

Can Evan uncover the truth of his family’s murder before the shadowy figures running the experiment silence him permanently? How can he out-run an enemy who knows his every move even before he makes it?

That kinda shit! What do you think?

Comments please

Ta ta.