Minute44 - Dan Schonhaar

There’s a good few movies coming out in the first half of next year that I’m chomping at the bit to go and see. Alien vs. Predator: Requiem, Rambo, Cloverfield, Iron Man… the list goes on. All of those films have their own flavour of hype, AVP:R looks to be the film we so desperately wanted last time round, Cloverfield is shrouded in mystery to the point where we’re not even 100% sure it will actually be called Cloverfield and Iron Man… well, it has Robert Downey Jr. flying around in a red and yellow metal suit. That’s all well and good but none of these are coming from especially acclaimed production pedigrees. One film however seems truly worthy of the hype… and, ironically, it’s not actually had that much. On May 22nd the UK will see the release of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

Very Little is known about the latest installment other than it will be set in the 1950s, roughly 20 years after the original trilogy which is, in my eyes, a very good decision. This is because, firstly, it won’t require any ridiculous fanwanks to explain Indy’s sudden age jump and secondly it allows us to have a new enemy. Sure, the nazis served the original trilogy well but I think using them again would be a little bit like money for old rope. The main cast seems to be Harrison Ford, Shia LaBeouf, Ray Winstone, Cate Blanchett and John Hurt among others. This seems to suggest that the plot will have a lot to do with Great Britain, at least I hope it will. Nothing pisses me off more than hiring British actors to play Americans. There’s just no need. Other than that and a few teaser photos we’re being kept in the dark thus far. I want to share with you the reason I’m so excited about this release.

For me Indiana Jones is more than just a series of films, it’s an institution. I watched all three films this morning and enjoyed them as much as the first time I saw them. I’ve always thought them to be George Lucas‘ best work, forget Star Wars… I’ve never been a fan. Whenever I watch one, it brings a smile to my face and I’m 8 all over again. It’s fantastic. Everything about them is excellent. The scripts are cheesy but so much fun, the special effects are good but not so good it turns you into a drooling brain dead mong who cares about nothing else and, most importantly, they capture the true nature of adventure. They’re set during world war II for a very specific reason. Could they have been set in the present day? Sure, of course they could have but they would have sucked. The 1930s served to make the most out of any adventure. If you got lost there was no GPS to get you un-lost, if you came across a puzzle you had to rely on your wits, not your satellite phone. If you ask me, and that’s just if you ask, the Tomb Raider films failed for this very reason. Audiences will always favour the adventurer with the best skills, not the best gadgets. Jason Bourne is so much better than Ethan Hunt because he is an action hero, not a man with a watch that has a mini-gun in it and a computer up his arse.

Having the best stories isn’t the only thing that made these films so great. If you asked me what the formula for the perfect movie was, again only if you asked, I’d tell you that the closest you could get is the Indiana Jones trilogy. George Lucas’ imagination, Stephen Spielberg’s vision and a soundtrack by John Williams… not to mention the hottest actor of the time for your hero. This fourth installment is going to be the tester though. Will this winning formula work in 2008? I firmly believe that, if left to their own devices, Spielberg and Lucas will turn out another amazing film that will wow me in the same way the first three did and still do. My main worry is that modern Hollywood stands a good chance of destroying this by trying to appeal to a new audience. It seems to be their party piece at the moment. The existing fan-base for Indiana Jones must number in the tens if not hundreds of millions! They could make it a box office hit just by appealing to them. Corporate fat cats with ideas above their stations, however, seem to think it’s acceptable to say “Better leave 100 million people thinking it was alright than making 50 million thinking it was incredible.” Surely the best way to sell tickets is to create a great film, not make a shit one and hype it up the yin yang.

The adventure movie genre has been hit or miss for the past 15 years. The superb Pirates of the Caribbean spawned two over the top, overly complicated and, frankly, boring sequels, Nicolas Cage said “AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!!!” in National Treasure and The Da Vinci Code came up short on the big screen. Attempts have been made to replicate the Indiana Jones; Tomb Raider the game had more in common with it that the two movies ever did and National Treasure just turned out ridiculous. I think we’re due a revival.

I beg you, modern Hollywood, don’t fuck this up. Don’t compromise what could be a great nostalgic adventure movie and apply so much gloss the original fans no longer recognise it. Leave the original dream team to do their job and do it like they did in the 80s! Remember why the first three were so successful. At the same time, don’t forget your audience. The Indiana Jones films were rated PG but they weren’t just for kids. This is complicated to get right. Pirates’ failed because they created a plot so complicated only adults could follow it and coupled it with action and dialogue only suitable for children. Transformers failed because they forgot that the adults who would be taking their kids to see it were huge fans of the cartoon and would be expecting to see something resembling that. Time will tell if I will be impressed with this fourth installment or be left wanting to book a ticket to Los Angeles to carry out some revenge attacks.