Omg! Hollyoaks just had the worst explosion special effects ever. Channel 4 must be feeling the pinch.
Supermarkets push petrol below £1
About fuckin time!
Web Standards 2008: Three Circles of Hell :: A List Apart
Really interesting article about how the standards movement is perhaps harming the web and what we can do to help.
Teenager survives after knife plunged five inches into skull
Yeah, that's not what you want... :(
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Directed by: David Gordon Green
Starring: Seth Rogen, James Franco
Dale Denton (Rogen) and Saul Silver (Franco) star as customer and drug dealer respectively as they must try to save their own lives after witnessing a murder where even the police are involved in this kind of clever but not clever at all laugh riot.
Directed by: Chris Carter
Starring: David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson, Billy Connolly, Amanda Peet, Xzibit
***WARNING - POSSIBLE SPOILERS***
It’s been about 7 years since we last saw the two most famous FBI agents in the world and despite the series winding down in popularity (and credibility) towards the end, they left us wanting more. Well, now, all these years later we get more. Mulder and Scully, now no longer employees of the FBI are enlisted by the bureau once again, this time to help find a missing agent with the help of a convicted paedophile priest (Connolly) who also claims to be a psychic.
continue reading Review - The X-Files: I want to Believe (15)
Directed By: Christopher Nolan
Starring: Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Gary Oldman, Maggie Gyllenhaal
A year (in movie time) after the caped crusader appeared on the streets of Gotham City, Crime is coming to an end. Mobsters and thugs who were previously untouchable are being brought to justice and corruption is dying a death. A new District Attorney, Harvey Dent (Eckhart) is finishing the work Batman is starting by seeing the criminals put behind bars in their hundreds. But the criminal element in the city finds unlikely… and deadly support in the form of an unknown psychopath known as The Joker. It soon becomes clear that Gotham now needs Batman more than ever before.
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Starring: Harrison Ford, Cate Blanchett, Karren Allen, Shia LaBeouf, Ray Winstone
After a 19 year hiatus from the silver screen, everyone’s favourite archaeologist and adventurer returns. On the trail of a mythical city of solid gold, Indy and his new found sidekick Mutt Williams (LaBeouf) must seek out a lost crystal skull, said to have untold power. Hot on his tail, however is Irina Spalko, a Russian scientist and lunatic obsessed with the possibility of psychic warfare. Indy must not only find the skull and city of gold before they fall into the hands of those pesky reds but he must also deal with some hard-hitting surprises a lot closer to home.
continue reading Review - Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (12a)
I’ve not done one of these for a while so I thought I’d talk about some things that are due for a release in the coming months. I’ll also talk about the success (or not) of some of the things we’ve already seen this year. I’m as excited as ever about the forthcoming releases that summer has to offer, particularly as it sees some of my favourite actors/directors/franchises making their triumphant returns.
Last week I decided to take Thursday and Friday off work so Nat and I could have a nice 4 day weekend together. Not done it in a while and because Nat works on Saturday evenings we don’t tend to have much of a weekend together. Also, as it was both of our pay days on Friday we figured it would be a good time to do it.
That’s how the saying goes and I’m inclined to believe it. Get someone hooked early and you’ll have ‘em for the duration. I believe this translates to cinema as well. Opening credits, although they may seem like a formality, are absolutely key in forming a person’s opinion of a movie. Sure, the movie itself might be so good or so bad that the person’s impression of the opening credits doesn’t count for much but I think they are few and far between. I tend to find that if I’m impressed with the opening credits of a film I will be much more receptive to the rest of it’s duration. there are three main components in a title sequence; Typography, Visuals and Music/Audio. The key, it seems, is knowing how to apply them in the correct proportions. The best opening sequences apply the three components in a way that best suits the movie. I’ll show you three of my favourite ever title sequences each of which uses one of these components to a greater degree than the other two.
A good few months ago now, a friend of mine said “hey, did you know that they’re making a new X Files movie?” and, indeed, I did not know. I was pretty surprised though especially considering how the series ended. You wouldn’t think there would be much scope for a new movie in the main mythology of the X Files. But, alas the rumour has turned out to be true and the new movie is due for release on August 1st this year.
Hi people… lots to share this time. 
Had a 4 day weekend to be out and about. Friday Myself and Nat took a trip to Nottingham to have some lunch and walk around the shops a bit. We went to Wagamama for lunch, if you’ve never been, go. It’s fantastic. I had the signature Wagamama Ramen and Nat had a rice dish with chicken, vegetables and oyster sauce. We shared a serving of gyoza, Japanese dumplings with chicken and spring onion which are steamed and finished on a grill. Whenever I eat there I always leave with a sense of well-being and content… soul food ftw!
I’ve been thinking a lot about putting together a CD of 20 or so songs from movie soundtracks. I find that (I can’t stress enough that this is MY personal opinion.) the songs that are called “classics” from movie soundtracks are the shittest. They’re cheesy and way over-rated. I’m talking about your Unchained Melody from Ghost and Kiss Me from She’s All That. Far too much stock is put into these songs. I want to include songs that make me smile because they remind me of a good movie.
I was planning on going to see No Country For Old Men tonight as I had nothing else to do but when I looked to see what time it was on, I found, to my surprise that it wasn’t showing at Mansfield, Derby or Chesterfield! I was gobsmacked. If i want to see this film I’m going to have to drive to Nottingham at the very least! I understand it’s not the biggest film out at the moment, nor has it had the hype of some of it’s rivals but it is a Coen Brothers film after all and it does star Tommy Lee Jones and Woody Harrelson, not small-time actors.
So I’ve decided to embark on a mammoth enterprise. I’m planning on watching every episode of The X Files from “Pilot” to “The Truth“. That’s nine seasons of between 19 and 24 episodes each episode being 45 minutes long. I looked at my collection on the shelf and realised I had never watched all the episodes close enough together to be able to put the story together properly. I mean, I know roughly the whole conspiracy plot and who did what and why, but There are elements of the main arc that I still don’t quite know. For example, I’m a little fuzzy on the whole involvement of Alex Krycek and the well manicured man.
So yeah, this is my 5 favourite movie characters, in no particular order. Once you’ve read my list, I’d love to hear yours!
Next weekend (the 18th) the much anticipated POV monster movie, Cloverfield hits US screens. From producer JJ Abrams, Cloverfield seems to be breaking new ground when it comes to hype and viral publicity, but will it live up to the, near unattainable, hype it has created for itself?
There’s a good few movies coming out in the first half of next year that I’m chomping at the bit to go and see. Alien vs. Predator: Requiem, Rambo, Cloverfield, Iron Man… the list goes on. All of those films have their own flavour of hype, AVP:R looks to be the film we so desperately wanted last time round, Cloverfield is shrouded in mystery to the point where we’re not even 100% sure it will actually be called Cloverfield and Iron Man… well, it has Robert Downey Jr. flying around in a red and yellow metal suit. That’s all well and good but none of these are coming from especially acclaimed production pedigrees. One film however seems truly worthy of the hype… and, ironically, it’s not actually had that much. On May 22nd the UK will see the release of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
continue reading I beg you, modern Hollywood, don’t fuck this up!
This isn’t an easy piece to write for many reasons… Firstly, there are hundreds of thousands of actors working in Hollywood today. Granted, major studios tend to pick casts from a list of about 50 names (Unless they’re working on a Tarantino picture. I wouldn’t be surprised if that guy considered raising actors from the dead in a voodoo ritual if he thought they would be a good accompaniment to Samuel L Jackson in his next big role… Robert Forster for Christ’s sake!) and that is split up into age groups so casting crews have an even easier job. Despite this list, I have to think about MY favourite actors from the thousands of movies I’ve seen, be it a working legend like Robert De Niro or the forgotten action hero Michael Beihn.
continue reading My 5 favourite Actors, in no particular order.
Good news everyone! One of my personal heroes, Henry Rollins is coming to the UK doing a spoken word tour. Monday the 28th of January he’s appearing at the Wulfrun Hall in Wolverhampton and tickets are a snip at £17.50, even more of a snip seeing as Mother is buying mine for part of my Xmas present! continue reading I can’t get behind that!!
Weren’t the 80’s fucking amazing? I remember that in the 90’s we hated the 80’s and the style and still to this day I think a lot of the 80’s style still sucks a fat one. However, how awesome was it living back then. I was born in ‘83 so was only really conscious of the last half of the great decade but what a decade!! Let’s first talk about the TV shows… You have your obvious ones… Ghostbusters, Transformers, He-Man and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but if I think back there were some really great obscure ones too. I’m talking about M.A.S.K, Dino-Riders and Captain Power. These made up my after-school viewing and made me the uber-geek I am today! I’m not just talking about cartoons either. What about Doogie Howser MD and The Twilight Zone… All great stuff. continue reading Illusion is the ultimate weapon!
Ok…. so, last night Me and Nat went to see The Simpsons Movie in Mansfield… All well and good. So, I go to meet Nat at the BP garage and fill up while I’m there… I go inside to pay and the woman behind the counter fucks up somehow and basically she needed to use one of those retro card machines with a roller that prints the card onto paper… but that thing then proceeds to chew my card up and crack it right across the bloody chip!! At this point I was furious! And to make it worse the woman was so damn myopic she couldn’t see that I may in fact want to use my card for something other than petrol that evening. In the end It transpired that the cash machine accepted my and I was able to pay for the petrol. But I was still furious…. I hate violence towards women… I think men who raise their hands to women are fucking cowards who are only one rung higher on the ladder than a rapist. But I tell you what. I wasn’t half tempted to give that stupid bag a slap!!
Anyway, I go get changed and we set off. I get to mansfield to discover that they had removed Initial D from the arcade bit! This night just keeps getting better. So I text Nate Dogg an tell him and he replies that I should kill some fools! I’m inclined to agree.
However… the simpsons movie was pure aceness!! It could have been done in an episode… sure but this was all nicely polished and really well animated. Also… quite shockingly, you see bart’s wang! I was like 
as if you’ll ever see that in an episode!! Another funny thing is that they kill off Green Day and then Mrs. Lovejoy plays American Idiot (Funeral Version) on the organ in church! Obvously I’ll do a review of it later on…
So the film was good and the night was turning out alright… Until… Near Hilton I was aproaching a junction and looking left and right to see if I would be able to go when… SHIT THE BLOKE IN FRONT OF ME HAS STOPPED!!!! CRASH!!! and I bumped into the back of him! Fuck, shit, bugger, bollocks, cock, Barbara Striesand!!!!
So we both pull over to the side of the road to check out the damage… My bumper is cracked and theres a small dint in my bonet near the H emblem but the damage doesn’t look too bad. His car, however didn’t seem to have much of a mark on it at all… a bit of a scuff but that appeared to be it. So I say to him “I suppose you want my insurance details etc…?” and to my surprise he didn’t seem bothered and said “Well let’s just wait and see what the damage is. Give me your phone number and name.” So I though.. ooh, this might not be so bad. He either is planning on being nice if possible and not going through the insurance… orrrr… he’s not insured himself. Either way I’d be thankful. He said he’d get it looked at and call me today or tonight to let me know whats going on. So fingers crossed it’s all ok. For now it’s just not knowing that’s kinda doing my fruit in.
I just couldn’t believe I’d done it. I’m a super careful driver and people take the piss out of me all the time saying I drive like a grandad. It just goes to show. Be careful on the road guys, one momentary lapse in concentration and you end up in a right mess. I’m thinking with the minimal damage to his car combined with what a heap of junk it was… He’s not gonna bother taking it further. Of course I’d be happy to pay for a new bumper for him out of my own pocket if he needed it but like I say… I think the most it will need is some back to black. Fingers crossed.
Well, let me tell ya… I was friggin wide awake after that!! I don’t think I blinked on the way home. lol
Ta ta for now people.. I’ll let you know how I get on.
Thats right folks!! Was an ace weekend. Nat came down on Friday night and so did Brahn and Laura and I cooked my famous pasta shells.
Recipe:
Mix 2 x 250g pots of full fat ricotta chese, one bag of baby spinnach leaves (cooked and finely chopped), 10-15 green and/or black olives, 2-3 anchovy fillets and black pepper in a bowl until thouroughly mixed. This is the stuffing.
Cook a sufficient ammount of Conchiglioni (large pasta shells) to fill a casserole tray until al dente and rinse them under cold water so it is easier to handle while stuffing.
using your hands and a fork stuff the cooked shellsand arrange them in the casserole tray being careful not to overlap them. Once the tray is full pour a large jar of tomato and basil pasta sauce over the shells, evenly covering them. Use the best quality sauce you can get hold of. I use Lloyd Grossman sauce but pick one that you like best.
Finally sprinkle grated cheese over the shells and sauce and bake in the overn for 25 minutes at 180 degrees untill the cheese is melted and golden brown.
Serve with traditional garlic pizza bread.
Pasta shells with spinnach and ricotta… DONE! 
So yeah, I made those. Me and Nat had a couple of bottles of wine too and we just chilled out and it was really nice.
Saturday we got up at an obscene time and then went into alfreton to spoons and then went to Chez vegas to meet Laura and Brahn at Laura’s house before heading into town to go to Pinnochio’s, this little itallian pizza and pasta house that Laura has been going to for 20 years! Me and Dan had Calzone and it was friggin fantastic!!
It was after this that the thing I have been looking forward to all week took place. We went to see the special advance preview of the Transformers!!!
I won’t go into it too much cos I’ll do a proper review tomorrow but it was friggin mint!!!
Was really really ace to spend the whole weekend with Nat. Was just so nice and easy going. That’s what I really like
Bye for now.
Hi guys..
Not got loads and loads to write about this time really, other than to say I had a very lazy relaxing weekend. Quiet morning tidying the house with some music on. I also got a call from work to sort a printer out but that could be done remotely so that was easy enough. Nat came round about 1 and we went into Notts for a bit where I bought a nice new adio t-shirt. It’s black with a white adio “A” emblem on the front with skulls in it and things. It reminds me of the Deftones’ self titled album cover cos it has skulls and what appear to be roses on it.
Anyway, we got back from Notts about 4 and went to Asda to get some nibbles and a bottle of wine. When we got back to my place we watched Anchorman which never fails to make me laugh. Nat thought it was pretty funny too. After that we were pretty hungry so I drove up to Co-co sun and got some foodz. I had Singapore chow mein and it was right nice. I also had some mini spring rolls! We then watched Shaun of the dead and had the wine. (Told you it was a lazy weekend)
Sunday we did bugger all! oh, except make the obligatory trip to mcarthur glen for some unhealthy food and some coffee from GJ’s Laaaavly!
I’m proper looking forward to seeing Transformers on Saturday. Looks like I’ll be going with Nat, Brahn and Laura. Should be good. Initial reports from the US seem to indicate that the film is really good and I have been battling my will power to not watch it in low quality online. Just this minute while writing this I’ve got word that good old Double D (edd) will be back from Norwich this weekend which will mean he may come with us to see this as well. Also…. Edd has Wii!!!!
On the topic of the Transformers, one thing I am mucho-unhappy with is the new theme. It is by MuteMath and it sucks…. hard! Check it out on their MySpace. Seriously, it’s fucking dire! “Autobots wage their battle to destroy the evil forces of the Decepticons” should not be uttered to that beat or that tune… ever!
Anyway, enough about that, the film looks too friggin good to be ruined by a dodgy theme song.
Tata for now!
Bon Weekend!!
Friday… Went out for something to eat at Zizzi which was nice. Their olives are the best!! I had a lovely pizza with Mushrooms, olives, pepperoni, parma ham and artichokes! Yum!! By the time I’d dropped Nat off and battled through the 10mph roadworks on the A516 - A38 on-ramp it was gone 1 am by the time I got in…. good job I had no work on Saturday!
Saturday… didn’t do a lot tbh, went to McArthur Glen with the newly engaged Brahn and Lola (Congratulations again guys!!) and had some lunch and some coffee from Gloria Jeans. I was gonna go to the Green Room but a. I coulen’t be bothered and b. No one ended up going. I just cooled out at home and watched the exorcist 2… it was pretty bad.
Sunday… well me and Nat were gonna watch Anchorman round at hers but I was awoken by a text from her saying we couldn’t for whatever reason so needed to rethink the day’s plans…. Went round her house about 12:30 and then we went into Derby for some lunch at the Standing Order. After that we wandered around some shops before realising it was a beautiful day and it would be rude not to go to markeaton park. We chilled out there til nearly 7 getting a tan! Then to top it all off we went to see the long awaited Die Hard 4.0! I tell you something…. It was fucking fantastic but didn’t feel like a Die Hard Movie. Don’t get me wrong, John Mclane was very much himself with the usual no nonsense wisecracks (”Last time I saw her she was at the bottom of an elevator shaft with an SUV parked up her ass”) but the feel of the movie and the action was definately not Die Hard. Don’t let this make you think that I enjoyed it any less though because it was still a kick ass action film that ticked all the right boxes for me. Well, there’s nothing out thats worth seeing now til the 20th when not only does Transformers come out, the Simpsons movie is also released.
Speaking of Transformers, I’ve changed my text message alert tone to the sound the transformers make when they change. It’s cool in a hugely geeky way!
Now, on to something a bit more serious. I noticed a couple of people on MySpace have posted this shock-jock bulletin regarding seal clubbing and animal testing. I say “shock jock” because they are images showing the suffering of these animals. Pictures of seals with their skulls split wide open and monkeys being experemented on with their limbs restrained. To these bulletins and to the people that aproach me in the street I say the same thing. Open your eyes a little wider!
Yes, the things seen in those images are horrific, no animal should have to suffer to that degree. Seal clubbing is something I cannot agree with and to that extent the bulletin is correct. It does need to stop. But the animal testing part just gets my goat. Just think where we’d be in the field of medecine if there was no animal testing? No chemotherapy, no antibiotics, very few vaccines. We’d be pretty much fucked without it.
So next timeyou hear someone talk about putting an end to animal testing, tell them to think about the last person they knew to make it through cancer or a heart bypass or overcome a potentially life threatening disease and think if they’d still be around if there was no animal testing.
Yes… the main event is tomorrow guys. I will of course be uploading plenty of photos for you all to enjoy, and I’m sure they will include me looking rather crisp in my, seldom worn, suit. I’ve gotta head over to Gaz’s parent’s house some time after 12 tomorrow and from there we will be in the wedding car to the church.
I’ve been thinking about weddings and more specifically holding them in churches. I mentioned to Reedy the other day that I wouldn’t feel at all comfortable getting married in a church because I am not a christian. In fact I would feel bad doing it as I would feel rather hypocritical making vows in the name of a god that I don’t believe exists. He seemed quite suprised and just said well, it’s tradition isn’t it? Well I suppose it is… like Easter or Christmas, two very chritian holidays that I still celebrate and relish the time I get off work for. I think the difference is, however that you can completely remove all religious connotations from christmas (Except the name of course.. unless you call it X-Mas or Annual Gift Day) and easter and just enjoy time with your family and friends. Church weddings aren’t there yet. You still make vows in the name of god and there are hymns and this and that… not to mention the procedings are overseen by a Preist.
With Gaz however I think it’s being held at the watchorn dispite his beliefs for a number of reasons. First and foremost, his parents got married there… and his grandparents and christ alive knows how many other generations. Also his family and what I have seen of Shel’s are fairly traditional people and, like Reedy said, Church weddings are traditional.
I just wish them both a really awesome day regardless. Of course as best man I have ring-side seats for the whole show, I even take part… by handing the rings over. Lets just hope they know their left from right when it counts! The fun will come at the reception, however, where I have to give a speech. I’ve spent months whittling about this speech and being unable to come up with any decent material. But then I had an epiphany. I’m funnier just off the cuff anyway and I’ve known Gaz well long enough to be able to throw together some witty anecdotes about the tenure of our friendship that should get a few laughs… and maybe a few heckles from the bridal party. 
It will mean Booze though and lots of it. and if there’s one thing I’m fond of, it’s beer. Although it remains to be seen if the ubiquitous community centre serves any beers worth a damn. If not it’ll have to be Jack and coke. Shorts will probably be better anyway as there will be, fuck knows how many, kids running about and sliding on their knees just waiting to knock a fresh pint out of my hand and if that happens I’ll probably go all Bruce Banner.
This evening I’ve been down to Derby with Nat and we saw Ocean’s 13. Although I’m not convinced she enjoyed it, I thought it was rather good and most definately bettered the fucking appalling Ocean’s 12. I think the fact that Julia Roberts played Julia Roberts in the second one saw the, once good, actress executed because she made no such apperance in this film. It was a very complex plot, a lot more complex than the previous two films but i think it was played well and was certainly shot well with a very very rat-packesque, 60s feel.
After the movie we went to the Dog and Partridge at Tutbury for something to eat… it was nice, I reccomend it, although I did detect an air of cliqueiness as I left with the local yoakles giving me the eye as I left. Oh well, it must just be like the Boundary, where if you’re not from Broadmeadows, upon entry, the music stops, everyone turns around and from somewhere behind the bar someone begins to whistle Ohio. I’m tellin ya man, it’s fucked up.
That’s about all I have to say this time guys and girls. Join me next time when I can tell you all about the Wedding… and show you photos! Good night!
Well, the annual Subculture beach party has been announced for Saturday the 4th of August. Fantastic, except that it’s the one weekend of the year where I have work commitments! It’s probably gonna be ok though because the work is usually out of the way by the tail end of Saturday which menas I’ll be able to drive down afterwards and get my drink on. The only bad thing is I’ll have to wait unitl the day itself before I know for sure. I hate not having a plan!
Well, on other news, this weekend is Gaz’s wedding and I have the pivotal role of best man in the procedings, a role shared with Scott, Gaz’s brother. I’m confident all will go to plan.. if not I’ll just get shitfaced. I’ve already told Holly that I can hang out with her on Sunday but I may need to be put in a cold shower to help me get out of the hang over. The only thing that is worrying me at this point is the speech I am to make… or the lack of one. My plan is to ad lib the whole thing but we’ll see how well that goes on the day.
Today is Pay day! Wooop!! It came around quicker than I thought actually I only realised it was the 27th when I switched my alarm off this morning and my phone said “pay day”. I was like, Kerching!!! Of course a chunk of it will have to go on clearing some out-standing bills but that shouldn’t be too much of an issue. I’m gonna go to ’snakes like I said in my last post and see if I can’t get a new pair of jeans. Failing that I’ll go to non-stop and get a pair.
Last night I watched Apocolypto again and enjoyed it just as much as the first time I saw it. Much laughing came at the expense of the half-wit chav at the video store though. Our first selection was Green Street which I’ve heard was really good and the chav came up and was like “Awesome film! Better than the Football Factory!!” So reedy instantly asked, in the most condescending way possible, “You mean more violent?” to which he replied “Yeah, huhuh” We promptly put it back on the shelf and grabbed Apocolypto to which the chav said “You know thats all in subtitles…?” I felt like going “Yes, unlike you, I can read. ;)” He was a knuckle dragging mouth-breather if I ever saw one. Which brings me to another pet hate of mine. Chavs that address you as “oi”. It winds me up no end. I just feel like turning around and exploding at them like “I hope you’re not addressing me you ignorant little worm! If you don’t know my name, excuse me will do. Now fuck off!”
I’ve managed to get Friday afternoon off work so I can chill with Nat in the because I will be occupied with Gaz’s wedding over the weekend. Might just go into notts or maybe Derby and get some dinner in ze evening.
Ooooh!!! The new series of FoneJacker starts on the 5th of July!! I seriously cannot wait for that as it always gets hearty belly laughs out of me. I’m a child at heart you see and a sucker for prank calls. “Good evening sir, my name is George Agdgdgwengo and I am calling from your bank…” Classic!!
In other news, I’ve been thinking about writing a short story. I’ve been loving the work of Philip K Dick recently and it has inspired me to do a kind if PKD-esque type sci-fi story with a little bit of Being John Malkovich thrown in. Sound odd? Well a lot of Dick’s work is quite weird and usually very complicated. For those of you not aware who he is, Philip K Dick is the writer responsible for A Scanner Darkly, Total Recall, Minority Report and Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep (Better known as Blade Runner).
I only have ideas as far as now but here they are… tell me what you think.
Evan is an average man, works a steady job, has a wife, children, all the usual stuff but he has an overwhelming sense that he is being watched. He can’t prove what he suspects but he finds himself looking over his shoulder to see no one and feels a presence in rooms in which he is surely alone. But when his family is brutally murdered the psychological and emotional trauma leads him to discover the unimaginalble and he soon discovers that being watched is just the tip of the iceberg. He discovers that he, among countless others are the unknowing subjects of a global experiment designed to compormise all aspects of personal privacy.
Can Evan uncover the truth of his family’s murder before the shadowy figures running the experiment silence him permanently? How can he out-run an enemy who knows his every move even before he makes it?
That kinda shit! What do you think?
Comments please
Ta ta.
Hey people, Long time!
So how have you been? Awesome… yeah I’m good thank you.
So yeah… what have I been up to… not a lot really I’ve been out a few times and this and that… Oh yeah!! I now have all 9 seasons of the X-Files!!! Fantastic viewing! Seen a lot of films since my last post too. I’ll go into them at a later date as I plan on posting here more often again but on with todays order of business first…
The Weather, of all things, is whats prompted me to write this. It fucking sucks! Lene Is stranded in Ironville (well, Codnor Park) because all roads are blocked due to water “up to ya car windows, at least”. I don’t believe for one minute in the whole “biblical” apocolypse but I do, whole heartedly beleive that a large number of us will one day be snuffed out by nothing more than a spot of bad weather a’la The day after Tomorrow.
I didn’t go to santa pod at the weekend because I had not interest in camping in some muddy ass deluge to see cars not run down the strip because it’s wet. Instead I cooled out with Nat on saturday and watched the 40 year old virgin. That was fun. I also had a look in Rollersnakes at some trainers I’m gonna buy next month.
Look!
I like them because they are very very similar to the classic Emerica Reynolds V1 which I had a pair of in Navy and Yellow a long while ago. They were the best pair of trainers I’ve ever owned!! Now they are £70 which is a lot but when your mama says that she’ll give you £50 towards them it kinda softens the blow!! The RollerSnakes shop was a load better than I remembered it too, I’ll have to go back when I have more time and root around properly. I wanna buy a new pair of jeans too cos My weight loss program is working a treat…. My jeans are all about falling off me now!
I went to watch Fantastic4: Rise of the silver surfer with Nat last week week too. That was a good film. Good effects and a fun, action packed story. Lawrence Fishbourne as the voice of the surfer was fantastic too!! It did the (Nearly) impossible and was a sequel that bettered it’s original. Now I can but hope and pray that Die Hard 4.0 is a fraction as good as the ones before it. Somehow I doubt that it will be, as a very drunk Bruce Willis said at a recent Nicks game, “better than the first movie!”
Anyway… I’ll call it a day on this one. Like I said, I’ll try and get back into posting regularly again. Also… Leave me lots of nice comments on my past posts too cos in the recent hosting fiasco I lost all your past ones 
Ta ta.
OK, so yeah, I know Thursday isn’t really the best day to talk about last weekend’s events but I properly couldn’t be bothered to do it until now.
Friday, I stayed in and watched Harry and Paul and Peep Show. Both were very funny but Harry and Paul had some kinda rubbish sketches in the mix this week.
Saturday I had to take my car to the gay-rage for it’s MoT which it sailed straight through with no problems! (Go team Honda!!) While I waited for that, I had some McBreakfast and got a text from Lolly saying that she had to look after her nephew or something so couldn’t chill with me if I went down to Brum earlier on. So, with that in mind, I went home and took my time getting ready. Decided, what the hell!? Kirsty and Lolly’s place is pretty easy to find if you’re in town so I’ll go on the 1 o’clock train and have a leisurely stop off in Notts.
Walked around Notts a bit but it was hot so I thought, rather than sweating all over the place I’d catch the next train to brum at about half past two. To my surprise, I fell asleep on the train and woke up at Tamworth, only about 15 minutes to go. I text Kirsty and said I’d be in town soon if she wanted to meet me.
Got into town about 4 and met Kirsty at the Newt. We then had a walk over to Oasis, this great big scene kid paradise, to meet Lolly. Kirsty got her nose pierced and we headed up towards the bullring where we met some people who’s names escape me at this time. Lolly picked up her new glasses and we headed back to the apartment. After coolin out for a bit me and Lolly had a drive up to the FOOKEN HUGE Asda-Walmart at Minworth. I shit you not it was a massive building but there was probably only as much inside it as there is at the Sutton Asda… was weird. Anyway, I bought some beers and a massive pizza to make sure that I didn’t get shit-faced off of like 3 drinks because all I had eaten all day was my McBreakfast.
When We got back, Ant was there and we cooked the pizza and had some beers while we waited for the others (Russ, Biggs, Jim, Bubble and Paul) to arrive. They arrived… then some others… who were a bit like chavs tbh. They kept themselves to themselves while me and Bubble discussed the finer points of exposing a paraplegic scientist to a zero-gravity environment and furthermore shooting him out of a cannon. About half 10 me, Russ, Biggs, Bubble, Jim and Paul headed over to Subs.
I was actually already kinda drunk by this point and the rest of the night is quite a blur. I remember doing stupid dances upstairs with Biggs and Bubble and I remember seeing Jessica but not for long… I also remember Russ giving me a spare wristband that he acquired somehow. Later on Mel and Shelley made an appearance and I said hey to them and also checked out their new tattoos which were really nice. We stayed til the end and, mostly because of Sean, danced like fools. I woke up on Kirsty’s sofa feeling like this:
I went home around 4 and was so shattered that I went to bed around 8!!
Well, the week up to now hasn’t been too exciting. I haven’t recieved a letter from Nottinghamshire constabulary as of yet (touch wood) about me speeding near Holly’s house the other week. I didn’t go to the movies this week because for one, there was nothing I wanted to see and for two, Spiderman 3 comes out tomorrow and I wanna see that sooooo much!! Bring on Venom! In fact, Roll on the weekend in general because it’s a 3-day beast!! Wooooo!
Bye for now!!
So orange Wednesday comes around… Holly and I decide to take advantage and go and see The Reaping starring Hillary Swank. I wasn’t expecting much from it to be honest, other than an entertaining no-brainer. That’s exactly what I got. Swank’s acting, as usual, wasn’t too bad but the other performances were pretty dire and the story seemed a little bit old hat to be honest.
The story goes; Katherine Winter (Swank) is an ex-minister who turned her back on God following the murder of her husband and daughter while carrying out humanitarian work in the Sudan. Having lost her faith, Winter takes up a new career as a debunker of “miracles” for a university. Her and her partner, the highly religeous Ben (Idris Elba) are sent out to the small town of Haven to investigate a river turned to blood following the apparent murder of a local boy at the hands of his sister. Shortly after beginning to examine the river the pair are amazed when hundreds of dead frogs begin to fall from the sky, the second of the 10 biblical plagues. It soon becomes apparent that the cause of these plagues (River of blood, Dead frogs, Flies, Dead Livestock, Lice, Boils, Locusts, darkness, Death of the first born and Fire from the skies) is somehow related to the girl accused of her brother’s murder.
The film is so hugely predictable that I not only saw the “twist” coming, I knew who the baddy was going to be from the very first time he’s on screen. I will however say, it’s quite entertaining as a no-brainer and if you want to just detatch from reality for an hour and a half, check it out. It’s not scary but there are one or two scenes that make you jump… these, however are also very predictable.
The real bitch was on the way to pick up Holly… I turned off the A38 at the Ashfields Pub, onto a 30 area. I was doing just shy of 40 when I noticed the police van in my rear-view!!! SHIT SHIT SHIT!!! I turned onto Holly’s estate thinking that they were gonna pull me over for sure but no. They just carried on. So I’m thinking that they either had something better to do and I’ll get nothing or they’ve got me on video and I’ll be getting a letter in the next few days. That would be just fine and dandy :(. I tell ya I’m unlucky enough to get a fine and points. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a safe driver bordering on grandad driving. I, least of all, deserve a speeding fine!
Tonight, I think I’m gonna watch Dog Day Afternoon. I don’t know why but I’ve had an overwhelming urge to watch it all day. It’s a kick ass film starring a really young Al Pacino as an awkward bank robber. His robbery id foiled by a series of unfortunate events and before long, the inevitable hostage situation is the hottest thing on TV. Based on a true story. Spot on!
Saturday, tomorrow, I’ll be up quite early cos I’ve gotta go and MoT my car at 9:30 at Birchwood gay-rage… After that, assuming it goes well I’ll go get breakfast and then prepare to go to Brummieland. Kirsty and Lolly are having a party at their appartment in the evening with a possible (more than likely) outing to Subs. Not been to brum in ages so should be good fun I’ll go about mid day to Brum and meet Lolly and maybe Bubble and go round town.
Buh-bye for now…
Hallo!!! Apologies for the long-ish hiatus from posting, there has been a bit of a disaster from which I am still recovering. If you look around the site you will notice one or two things that still need to be put right such as links within posts and my favourites list. I am getting there however and we should be back in full swing soon enough.
So what have I been up to in the past week or so, well, a lot would be the answer. This saturday just gone I decided to have, yet another BBQ and invite a load of people off flashmosh for some drinkage! So plans were made about a week in advance and Russ and I checked the weather forecast every day to make sure proceedings were still a go. So on the day, Russ and Bongo came round about 4 and we went off to Tesco for supplies. Among the supplies were about 5 bags of ice which we poured into the kitchen sink and put beers into. This proved to be a really good cooler which remained cold until the following morning.
So Me, Russ, Reedy, Bongo, Mojo and Rock Tom sat enjoying Ice cold beers in the garden at about 5, Shortly after, I started cooking and shortly after that Gravy arrived bearing meat and 4 varieties of home made wine (Pea Pod, Ruhbarb, Elderflower and Mixed fruit) all of which were strong as fuck and… slightly halluinagenic. Later on, Nat, Jungle, Liam and Miggles arrived and the real drinking began….
The rest was a blur except, Kelly came round who I’d not seen for aaaaages which was awesome! She talks… SO FAST! It was kinda hard to keep up, especially after Gravy’s “wine” and the copious amounts of other booze I’d put away. But yeah, was ace to see her and catch up and what not…
With the exception of Russ throwing up, it was a good night.
The morning saw the clean-up operaton which thanks to some hired, Ukranian help got done fairly quickly. Russ, having been made to sleep in the shed, woke up, rather conveniently, after all this had been carried out. We all chilled out over coffee for an hour or so before the lodgers all went home.
See Nat’s pictures of the events….
In entertainment I simply have to point your attention towards two new TV shows that are currently airing. One, is the new series of Peep Show starring the, always hillarious, Mitchell and Webb and the other is Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse’s new show, Ruddy ‘ell it’s Harry and Paul. I wasn’t expectiong much from it to be honest with you as I’ve found previous offerings by them to be mediocre at best. I watched it anyway and to my surprise I nearly popped a hernia from laughing so hard. I think My favourite bit was the Nelson Mandela sketch. Fantastic!! Also the José Mourinho bit made me laugh a lot too.
I’m not up to much this week really… Probably going to Kirsty’s party on Saturday and that may also involve subs but not sure… Should be fun though… Usually is when I go down there.
Today is Wednesday… Orange Wednesday to be precise… I may take in a movie later… I may not. But for now, I’m gone. Byeeeeee
Well, that’s it folks, Easter weekend ‘07 is done and because I had the cough of the gods all weekend I didn’t get up to much. I didn’t go to brum like I was planning to and I had an awful time at the green room because I coughed so hard it gave me a wicked bad headache… But besides all that unfortunate business I didn’t have that bad a weekend all in all.
I guess it kinda started on Wednesday to tell you the truth. Wednesday night saw the first BBQ of the year!!! So got some chicken cookin up and some cocktails made… Bob on! Also… on that Wednesday Edd brought round his Wii, how awesome!! He had Zelda but because we only had a few hours I didn’t bother trying to get into that. We just played wii sports. Mostly bowling, boxing and tennis… I was blown away by how addictive they all were… I’d have liked to have a go on baseball but I’m told that takes some getting used to. The wii really is an awesome console and the gesture based control is absolutely spot on. The wiimote is able to not only tell where it is in parallel to the sensor, it can tell how far away from it it is and what kind of a tilt it’s on, on several axis. As well as this it has a built in speaker and vibration function. I was totally impressed and I still say I would own one. The only drawback I can see now is the lack of games available for it.
Thursday I didn’t get up to much. I had to drive to Leicester for work and drop off and install a PC which wasn’t a bad job but the drive back was a right bitch!! the M1 was moving about 3 mph and the clutch in the company car was loads heavier than the one in my car so my left leg was about to fall off. On the upside, however, the car had AC which meant I was cool at least. but anyway… because of the draining drive that afternoon I didn’t really get up to much in the evening. Andrew came round with some beers and we watched a couple of movies.
Friday I took full advantage of the lie in available to me… Got up around 12, laavly jaably!! Andrew came round again and me, Reed, Mojo and Andrew went to Markeaton Park in Derby for some Frisbee throwing to take advantage of the lovely weather. I drove and Reed took some quite arty-farty pictures while we were in the car. Got there and actually considering it was a bank holiday and it was nice and warm, we managed to not only find a parking spot with ease, but managed to find one right at the very front! We played frisbee for an hour or so then all got a bit peckish so we did the unthinkable… went to McDonalds!!!! Here’s the thing, I hardly ever go to McDonalds any more… I used to work there and eat that crap every shift pretty much but I’m heavier NOW!! I know exercise counts for a lot but come on!! Anyway, I had one of those deli sandwiches, possibly the unhealthiest thing on the menu but the only thing that doesn’t leave you with that same shitty McDonalds taste in your mouth after eating it. I think worth the trade-off…
Saturday day time was spent doing not much because it was a trip to the green room that evening. I toyed with the idea of driving and in hind sight I really wish I did… I coughed so bad in there that I gave myself a stormin bad headache. That of course put me in a foul mood and I just wanted to go home. So the less we talk about that the better….
The up-side of not drinking much on Saturday night is the waking up on Sunday with no hangover!! Always good… I can’t however, remember what I got up to… Hmmm, a missing day. How odd.
Monday, Brahn and Laura came round and we took a ride to Ikea so Brahn could buy a desk. We found the desk no problem in the show room but when we went into the warehouse to pick it up there was only one left and that had damage on it in the form of a huge gouge in one end of it. So Brahn went up to find out if there were any more. There was no more and they wouldn’t even do a discount on the damaged one. He was not a happy chappy… I just gorged myself on Ikea hot dogs. haha.
Monday night we went to see Sunshine in Mansfield. It was pretty good and well acted for the most part but I was left wanting more of a back story and a little more substance… As it stands it’s kind of like a road movie in outer space with a little suspense and horror thrown in for good measure. You can tell the story was very heavily influenced by Event Horizon, a film made almost exactly 10 years prior, and you can draw very clear parallels between the two movies. Ship is lost, many years later it is found again and not all is as it seems…. I do say it’s worth seeing though I would also say Event horizon is better but a lot more geared towards a horror audience. It’s essentially a film about the first attempt at faster than light flight. The ship gets put through a kind of worm hole and goes missing for like 10 years. When it’s found they soon discover that it’s been through hell, literally. all kinds of nasty and spooky things happen. Good film. Wich brings us to yesterday…. I was back at work but in the evening me, Gaz, Shel and Sta went to watch 36crazyfists at Stealth in Notts. It’s the 2nd time I’ve seen them and they absolutely rocked the place!
Support were 12 tribes who, despite me being told they were shit, quite impressed me. The singer from 12 tribes even came out to sing with Brock on Elysium which was amazing. 36 then did a double encore playing Destroy the Map and Slit Wrist Theory. Was an awesome show and a really good venue. I’ve never been in Stealth before and I was quite impressed. It’s better than the basement at Rock City and the sound is a stack better. It was also good for me cos I don’t like being in mosh pits. My logic is, I pay all that money to see the band play, not to worry about some jumped up little fucker kicking me in the head. So I went quite far back and because I’m so tall I still had a perfect view. Kosher!
Enough of me for now peeps… catch ya laterrrr.
This was brought to my attention last night and I just had to tell you all about it… It could possibly be the greatest prank ever pulled. Or, at least the best executed.
Basically, it took place when we were at school, I’d say about 1997… Mr. Reed was one of the first people we knew to have Internet access at home so one day me and Gaz went round to use the Internet for it’s proper purpose, surfing porn. I had this bogus stupid fake software that generated “Credit card numbers” which was obviously bollocks, but reedy didn’t know this… anyway… the numbers, of course, didn’t work and we didn’t gain access to any porn that required payment, just the free stuff.
So a few days go by and we happened to mention what we looked at to some of our mates at school, including Jonathan Shea (a super-genius). The prank then took shape. Shea created an email account at school and sent a message to Reedy to this effect:
Dear Mr. Reed,
It ahs come to our attention that you have been using stolen credit card numbers to attempt access to a number of premium rate adult websites over the last few days. We have traced your IP address and we have confirmed that it is indeed yourself that is making these attempts from your home address of **********.
This is a very serious charge and you and your parents/guardians will be receiving a notice of prosecution for you through the post in the next few days. The penalty for such an offence is typically a custodial sentence of 3-7 years and an unlimited fine.
We advise you to seek council immediately in lieu of your court date. If you cannot afford your own council then please make us aware of this by filling in the appropriate part of the notice of intended prosecution you will receive in the post.
Regards,
Joe Bloggs - HM Fraud Squad
Obviously, to adult eyes that letter is bollocks but to a 14 year old kid it is the stuff of nightmares. Not only was the e-mail very officially worded, thanks to Shea, it had logos on it from the fraud squad as well as major credit card companies. Reedy bought it hook, line and sinker. Of course, he came and told me and Gaz immediately and the hardest part of the prank was not letting him know that we knew it was a trick. But, thanks to good acting on our part and a little bit of naivety on Reedy’s part we nailed it! I’ve never seen someone with a look of more dread in his eyes both of getting pinched but also the shame of having his parents know he was doing a little one-handed surfing.
Reedy spent the next week sweating and looking over his shoulder. It was hilarious! We had to tell him it was a joke the day he came up to us and said he was going to tell his parents that evening. Obviously me and Gaz could have got it in the neck for looking at porn in the first place so we told him… but we didn’t just tell him outright… oh no. That would have been boring. We did it over another very official e-mail….
Now, this is what I love about Reedy, he took it sooo well. He could have gone ape shit and beat the living piss out of all of us but no.. he just let out a huge sigh if relief and smiled like the Cheshire cat for the next few hours. It was absolutely brilliant I can only hope that I’m privy to another prank of it’s calibre one day in the future!
Top class stuff!
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September 11th, 2008 || 